Okay, I admit it. There’s no use denying it. I am clumsy and I come from a long line of clumsiness. It’s a proud heritage I have many memories of. My little Grandma falling down repeatedly, and then getting up laughing. My mom, falling down the stairs. Often. My sisters speckled with bruises from falling for more reasons than I can categorize, although the majority had to do with horses. Yes, it must be in our DNA.
“Be careful!” he says as I trip over my own feet. “What happened?” they ask as the interrogation begins. They should be used to this by now! “I don’t know,” I tell them. “I was just walking along and all of a sudden, I stumbled.” When it’s all over, I laugh to myself at what it must look like when it is happening. I feel like a participant in a slow-motion movie while tripping and putting one foot in front of the other for quite an impressive distance as I slowly start to descend towards the ground. There she goes. 60 degrees. 45 degrees. 30 degrees. And she’s down!
After having had a different kind of surgery on each foot, I started to notice a change to my gait. I sometimes stumble. I sometimes fall. I look over my shoulder. Who is watching? Who saw this? How embarrassing! And then finally, the acknowledgement of pain. Did I break anything? Can I recover from this fall? Though physically I stumble often and fall on occasion, I don’t have to worry so much about the steps I take in my faith. I have someone leading me, directing me. “Step here. Avoid that puddle. Look out for those slippery rocks.” Just as a toddler learning to walk grasps the strong and steady hands of his parents, I can hold onto the Lord.
The Lord directs the steps of the godly.
Psalm 37:23-24 NIV
He delights in every detail of their lives.
Though they stumble, they will never fall,
for the Lord holds them by the hand.
With my hand in His, I will not fall. He directs me around the ankle-twisting hidden holes that are in my path. Despite the fact that my faith-based clumsiness can sometimes be a pain, he delights in helping this toddler in faith learn to catch her stumbles and not fall. He delights in it! With great patience, he holds me by the hand. What more could I ask for? On my own, I am clumsy in my faith. On my own, I stumble and fall. With the Lord, I may still stumble, but he doesn’t let me fall. As I slowly start to descend to the ground, his strong and mighty hand steadies me. How thankful I am that he holds me by the hand. Let me squeeze tightly and never let go.
My clumsiness is dropping things all the time. Been doing it as far as I can remember.
But in our stumbling in life has taught me also to look at the situation. Lean on God, and not our own.
Thanks for sharing, Jackie. How fortunate we are to have him to lean on!